Pregnancy Dreams

So, I've been dreaming a lot when I get a decent night's sleep. (I'm not sleeping well at all.)

And I've been having some pretty crazy dreams... and I thought I'd share them here, because well, why not?

And to hold you over, Shannon has started documenting my pregnancy in the size of fruits that our babies measure to... here are the lemons from this week with the limes.

We have 2 lemon sized babies this week! (wk 14)

Pregnancy Dream #1: Desired
(I am obviously making up the names here...)

Wentworth Miller

Ok.. so this was my first pregnancy dream, and it was a complete surprise! I dreamt that I was being actively pursued by multiple people in multiple situations. I explained that I was married, and a few backed off, and then that I was pregnant with twins... and a few more left. Finally I was left with 2 or 3. I vaguely remember 1 man, but I can't place his face or anything really about him. I remember my sister being in the dream and I remember all of us Cosmic bowling (I've never ever been cosmic bowling, so that's about as ridiculous as having suitors when married and pregnant with twins.) The second of the suitors was a beautiful red-haired woman. Yes, a woman. She somehow talked me into dinner. And was completely mesmerizing, even though I knew I was married and pregnant. The last was Wentworth Miller. Yep, the actor with the brooding eyes, and gorgeous face. And he was persistent. It was like he was saving me. He didn't care that I was pregnant or that I was married. I was alone and he needed to be with me, to take care of me. It was hard to resist. I actually woke up feeling like he was still around, to find myself on an air mattress in a tent with Scott and Weston.
Freud's thoughts: I'm feeling alone and vulnerable. ;)

Pregnancy Dream #2: Cops and Robbers and... Weddings?

Ryan Reynolds

I was in a dream, and I was a detective, under cover. And there was a ton of action going on - police raids, gun battles etc. And then me and my partner were "made!" So we were on the run. And we ended up in a high end Bridal Salon, sort of like Kleinfeld's. My whole family was there. And I was rushed to try on dresses, to have the whole experience! And my partner was to do the same. We were undercover, hiding from the bad guys in a bridal salon. Apparently our cover was so good that my own family believed it. Because out I walk in an amazing Reem Acra dress and the partner steps out in an amazing tux and I get my first look at him all cleaned up - and it's Ryan Reynolds. Seriously. I don't know what's going on, but suddenly we're getting married and I'm all confused because I know we're undercover, and he knows, but he seems up for it, so we head to the church. And that's when the car chase with the bad guys commences and I wake up during a hail of gunfire.
Freud's thoughts: I feel a need for Speed. And apparently a fairy tale.

Pregnancy Dream #3: Flight of the Navigator over Eternia

He-Man

So this one is the least memorable. But basically, Scott, Weston and I were vacationing in Eternia. You know, the place where He-Man and She-Ra live? In the Cartoon version. In Prince Adam's palace with all the usual characters. And we had a lovely time. And then we came home. And we were back to being in a live-action world. Weston pulls out of his backpack an animal that is like a cross between a kitten and a monkey. Some wild feral animal from Masters of the Universe. And it's very cuddly and Weston wants to keep it. :)
That's about it for that one...
Freud's thoughts: Too many cartoons before bed. :)

So, that's the dreams for now. I will be trying to take notes so everyone can enjoy my overactive, hyper-sensitive imagination. :)

Babies!

I'm super busy all the time, so much so, that I am even working from home.

So, here's the latest update:

the Babies are doing just great. Baby A's heartbeat was 168 bpm, and B's was 156 bpm. Leading may to speculate that we are having one of each gender. Our doctor assures us that it is a an old-wives tale, and we can't guess the gender from that. Weston and Scott still want 2 baby girls. I would like at least 1 daughter. We'll find out in about 3+ weeks. :)

For now, here's a picture!

Happy July!

So... I've been busy and trying not to think about the long wait of our ultrasound.
But, it happened on Tuesday, finally!

And both babies are doing great!!! They were measuring about 1 day ahead of schedule (and can go +/- 1 week at any time.) Their heart rate was 178 (A) and 176 (B) beats per minute. They looked good, and my visit went ok.

Our Facebook Announcement

So, we blasted the news on Facebook, etc.  It was just too hard to keep secret. Weston has known for over a week. He took it really well, but is pretty much over it now. :)

So the babies are good. I, on the other hand, am not. I found out at my OB appt that 3 of the 4 regular medications that I am on, are not good for our babies. I immediately stopped one of the blood pressure pills and was scheduled for an emergency appt with the Endocrinology Center at Mercy on Wednesday morning. All of my diabetics medications have been stopped. I am now on Insulin Pens 4 times a day, but it will most definitely increase. That was the huge difference. Being told by my family doctor that my numbers are good, and then suddenly finding out that even my best number isn't good enough was just devastating. I want to do all I can to give these babies a healthy start. And feeling like I wasn't given the right information off the bat... it's so frustrating. But, while I have a long way to go, and I'm not close to where I need to be yet, I do feel like I am on my way. I really liked the Endocrinologist and the Diabetic Educator. And I think that's a great start!

So, we had an uneventful 4th of July. Scott had to work, so Shannon and I took Weston to the Altoona Aquatic Center. And she and I both got sunburned pretty badly. It's like the sunscreen doesn't even work anymore. Today I went to work while Scott stayed home with Weston. There's talk of a movie or maybe a trip to the playground at the mall. Whatever they do, it will be awesome. Tonight we're having dinner with friends and in the morning, Shannon and I are headed to the Des Moines Farmer's Market, finally! It's going to be a low-key, healing weekend. I need to get my kitchen in order. I need to the get the house in order, we have babies coming. :)

Longest Wait Ever

the wait until my next ultrasound is killing me. Literally. I can't take it. We have another 10 days. July 2nd. 2pm. can not come fast enough.

It's been exactly one week since we found out that our pregnancy was not only healthy and viable, but a double blessing of twins. And it feels so right. Like it was always like this. It's not as shocking to me as it is to everyone else. I don't know why.

Scott's still not into talking too much about Baby Names. I'm collecting a list... this is going to be tough. but so amazing!!!

It's the weekend. More specifically, it's Garage Sale weekend. I'm spending the night at my SeaStar's house in her amazing bed. Can't wait. But we have so much to do before 7am tomorrow morning. :)
The high for tomorrow is 95*, I really want to be done by noon.

Have a Happy Weekend!!!

here we go!

Yesterday, with the encouragement of my sister and the blessing of my husband, I bought a Prenatal Doppler on eBay. 

With this handheld device, we should be able to hear our babies' heartbeats at home. 

FDA approved Sonoline B Prenatal Heart Listener/Detector

This makes me both excited and so nervous that I could be sick. What if we don't hear anything? Or we only hear one of them? Is it better to know?

So... I have been having some lower-tummy trouble today. Not sure if it's food related or gas or something worse. I find myself praying a lot more that I've ever prayed. 

I am so scared that something is going to happen to our babies. That our fortune has just been too good to be true. I told our Workplace Chaplain, Jackie. She has encircled me with a prayer circle. I am not taking any chances.

Cross your fingers for me... To bring me peace.

So Blessed!!!

So our first ultrasound was today. And it was so stressful.  I was so worried. I practically made myself sick.
She called us in 10 minutes early. So I think of waiting room time was like 3 minutes. I got weighed - I've gained a pound. And then it was up on the table for the fun of the internal ultrasound. 

I looked at the screen and saw 2 black spots... and I couldn't quite see anything in them. So I thought that they were my ovaries. The technician was so calm and understanding. She goes, "Ok, here 's the baby. And here's the other one!" TWO BABIES!!! Oh My God. And there they were, snug and safe.

She asked if we were expecting this. And Scott immediately says no. And I was like, "Well, I've had twins on the brain all week." and I have. But I kept telling myself that all we needed was 1 baby. We didn't need to be greedy. But guess what? I'm going to be greedy!!! I want these 2 babies!!!

Scott's on Cloud 9 and I am so happy that I am shaking.

Both babies are measuring right on schedule and the same. In fact, their heart beats are the same too, 169 beats per minute!!! Everything looks great according to the Tech. We have no way to tell if they are identical or fraternal. If they are identical, then their egg split really early, and they landed away from each other. Otherwise, they are from 2 eggs. She said I definitely ovulated from the Right side, but couldn't see anything on the left. So we're in the dark on that one. :)

We want this so badly. We already want these babies. So, here we go, a new adventure! Weston is going to freak out! (in a few months when we tell him.)

Our new Babies. A & B. or Top and Bottom :)

Anxiety

Right now, I wish I had some Nutella... or a pile of Rolos. Or even a Snickers mini.

I've hit that point in the afternoon where I am usually digging through my purse for loose change. I'm getting hungry (again) and a little heartburn (again) and a little nauseous (again.) This happens at least 4 times a day. And never at the same time. It's worse in the morning. And because I take such a late lunch (around 1:15pm) it hits twice. I hold off until at least 9am, and then again at 11am. Yogurt and watermelon are this week's faves. But in the afternoon... all I want is chocolate. Damned vending machine, it sits there and whispers my name. Today, I could only find $0.55. So, I broke out the saltines... suck on them until the nausea abides (which it hasn't yet.) Now do you see why I'd love some Nutella? With the salt? OMG.

So... I also get heartburn when I'm having an anxiety attack. And I've been building one all day. The ultrasound is tomorrow. What if there isn't a baby again? What do we do? What if I don't have enough emotion left, or I don't show the right emotions?

My friend, Jess asked me last weekend if this pregnancy felt better than the last time. I didn't know what to say. They symptoms are different. This one is more like the little I can remember from my pregnancy with Weston. Or maybe I am seeing similarities to protect my heart. I just know that it isn't anything like the last one. That one was so extreme in almost every aspect. But the truth is, I can't remember. And when it comes to feeling anything inside of me... I don't. And I know it's early, but I feel like I should "feel" something, anything.

I am so scared of what is going to happen tomorrow.